mailbag

“How can I tell my child I love him?”

From the mailbag:

"Dear MamaBear,

I love my son, I really do.

But I was raised never to talk of love.

I try to tell him but I just can't.

How can I get over this?

Anonymous"

Dear A,

How about this mental image?

Your son is dead.

Bet you wish you had told him, aye?

My apologies for the harshness of my response, but sometimes…getting kicked in the balls with a realization can truly put things in perspective.

I empathize with your upbringing; so often, men are told never to show emotion and indeed, are mocked if they feel too hard.  It's even worse when you're raised that way as well.

Take a look at that sentence…

"It's even worse when you're raised that way as well."

That's how you're raising your son.

Horrible, isn't it?

If you cannot verbally tell your son how much you love him, consider instead writing a note to him.

Or sending it in a text.

Or asking your wife to tell him.

Let your son know that he's the world to you…and you're working on being able to express that.

We're all human, and while it would be great if you could fix yourself today….the probability is, it really will take time.

So let your son know in the meanwhile….you *are* there for him and some day…you'll be able to verbally express your love as well.

Thus speaks…MamaBear

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