Why good morning to you, gentle reader, and how was your weekend?
Mine was an exhausting roller-coaster of goodness, tears, relaxation and more.
The sad, teary part was attending the memorial service for our Sensei's son, Lincoln High, down in MD. I wrote about that over at In Memory of Lincoln High (8/24/93 – 8/13/11) – at only 17, he died in a freak tragic accident. The memorial service was very tough for me; it reminded me how you just never know when your time is up on this planet.
The goodness part was realizing that yes, I *could* do something for the family…and started creating a Memorial Site for him online. Others might have thought, it's not your place to do this, MamaBear….but hey. I figured the chances were, it would be received in the spirit I was giving it… and I'm so glad I did take that chance.
And the relaxing part was simply giving myself permission to shut down on Sunday late afternoon…. and watch TV, rest, hang out with the kids/husband etc. I have to admit, I love simply doing nothing sometimes. 🙂
Which brings me to today! It's a brand new week and it's time for me to amaze and astound you.
Ever wish you were privy to the very best secrets of successful parenting?
Well, on MamaBear, you certainly have bunches of them at your fingertips!
But let me zero in on the very best, #1 secret of successful parenting.
And it's this.
Focus on both *you* and your *child's* attitude, respect, imagination, and self-esteem.
In other words, ARISE!
It's the basic fundamental core parenting philosophy of the Mama Bear Mother.
You see, so many parenting ideas focus on how the parent should guide and raise their children….but kinda sorta drop the ball when it comes to the parent listening to the child as well.
Successful parenting, like with any relationship on this planet, goes both ways.
Certainly, your child must respect you, and also certainly, it's not a question of, you have to *earn* that respect.
You're the parent, bam, you deserve respect.
But at the same time…*your* attitude…should *compel* respect too.
In other words, when your child disagrees with you, you should encourage an open dialogue. Actively *listen* to your kids' feelings; they need to be validated that it's okay to have a differing viewpoint. You don't have to change your final answer, of course, but a great attitude will foster profound communications between you and your children.
- That makes life far, far more tolerable.
You see, we have *all* failed mind-reading 101. It's very easy to *imagine* what your children are thinking and for them to make assumptions on what drives your parenting actions….but when you both actively *talk* with one another……
It results in *understanding*.
Remember, it's *not* just your child's attitude towards you that makes parenting an adventure, it's also the attitude you project to your children that fosters an environment of growth.
Successful parents know…it goes both ways.
And that, of course, is a Very Good Thing indeed.
ps – speaking about Attitude, have you seen: